The first emails, the seeding of the blog.

I think the reason C-U was so welcoming of newcomers was that it was a small city (small cities) totally dominated by a huge university that was always bringing in new and diverse people from all over the world. A large portion of the population was from somewhere else. Transplants,either temporary or semi-permanent, without long established relationships to rely on will tend to go out and mingle. The university provided all kinds of cultural stimulation and people were open to new ideas and new acquaintances.

When we moved to St Louis, Tony and I found that everyone was already entrenched, for generations, in their small circles. It was a really weird sensation to live somewhere that did not ebb and flow around the semester schedule or summers. C-U in the summer was glorious!

Our social lives turned to completely revolving around our kids, their schools and sports. Our identities became Ann and Jim's mom and dad. As the kids took less of our time, we had work acquaintances and work happy hours. But I think KJ is on to something with his theory about our genetic timetable for forming friendships.

Good luck on your walk, KJ. Our park playgrounds and restrooms are closed, but it is specifically stipulated that we can walk for exercise as long as we keep our social distance from others. I don't know if we are allowed to sit on the benches. On Wednesday a neighbor and I took an appropriately social distanced walk and sat on opposite ends of a park bench to chat for a while. I think the bench was at least 6 feet long. I'll take my tape measure when I walk Peanut this morning.

BTW, I like your blog idea.

On Fri, Mar 27, 2020, 8:12 AM Ken Schadt <kenschadt@gmail.com> wrote:

When I left the land of milk and honey for Texas at the beginning of 1985, I thought I would just plunk myself down at some barstool and before long I would have a circle of beer drinking buddies just like in Champaign.  That never happened.  I think we are genetically engineered to make friends until maybe sometime around 25, and after that, not so much.  Additionally I had my whole life in Champaign, my friends, my stories, I kind of didn't even know who I was anymore.  And though I can be pretty extroverted among my friends among strangers I clam up.  I just don't make the casual conversation that leads to deeper conversation.

It wasn't much better when I moved to Chicago a couple years later.  It is just in the last ten years that I have found a Friday night bar, and taken improv, and taken to being Santa Claus that I have what I think of as an acceptable number of friends. 

I like reading and writing emails, but I have never liked phone calls.


They just closed all the parks last night.  I think it is still ok to just take a walk alone, but the powers are not expressly saying that it is.  Kind of warm today and I plan on taking a walk around the empty downtown, we'll see if I get arrested.  Pretty sure I will get off with a warning if it comes to that.  The busses and trains are running a regular schedule last I heard.  Out my window I can see the long flex busses glide down Wacker Drive, almost all of them empty.


Oh we did have a big house where we all lived together, it was called 501.  Oh I know you guys didn't actually live there, but you know what I mean.  I think me and JC are the only ones who are still alive.  Gerard maybe, geez I wonder if he is out now.


If they show game 7 again, and I'm sure they will, I'd like to see it.  I didn't intend to go down to the bar that day to watch it before the 4th inning or so because, well I didn't want to get too drunk.  Then a friend of mine in the building called me from the bar in the first inning and I thought, well, I will nurse my beers.  Oh yeah, that always worked.  But even so I was doing sort of ok, but then who expects a rain delay and then extra innings?  The end of the game is still pretty foggy to me.


Anybody interested in setting up a corona blog?  That way we won't have these long letters that end up just going poof, but something you can look back on.  You can post photos and make posts and it's pretty easy.  I will do all the setting up if you are interested.

On 3/26/2020 8:19 PM, S Fitzpatrick wrote:

Fox sports is showing game 7 of the 2016 World Series. I usually don't like to watch replays of games, but this one is an exciting gem, even though I know the ending. 

On Thu, Mar 26, 2020, 7:34 PM Nancy Flom <nflom1@gmail.com> wrote:

We were very social when we first moved out here.  Larry and I both made friends at our respective places of work, and we went to softball games with beer and pizza after, whale watching, movies and dinner on Friday nights, concerts, parties, etc. 

Quite the social butterflies.  Then, slowly but surely it started to taper off.  One couple we spent a lot of time with broke up.  Then people were laid off, and Larry's company moved to Utah and many of his friends went with them.  I still have a group of girlfriends from Fireman's Fund that I get together with and we occasionally have outings, like the county fair or the redwoods,  but Larry and I really don't get out like we used to.  We still do things, like that concert this summer, but not like before.  I find I don't mind so much, especially since I stopped drinking.  There's no place like home.

I do keep in touch with my brother through Facebook and e-mail, but he isn't the greatest correspondent.  I've tried to do better since we are the last two left of our nuclear family, and he is a little better now that he is retired. 

It would be fun to have a big house together, wouldn't it, with a big yard for flowers and a garden.  We would probably be bad influences on each other, though☺.

On Thu, Mar 26, 2020 at 9:09 AM James Turner <jetturner2001@gmail.com> wrote:

wow - this is an uplifting thread - thanks all - Nena 970.759.4389 - give me a call sometime and we can maybe find some more common ground for conversation.

Calling my brothers and their families is foreign to me, but always proves to be a wonderful experience, after the fact. Dysfunctional family backgrounds are difficult to abide, but what choice do we have?

calling my brother and his wife of more than 50 years today.

KJ - how did you get downtown today? is anyone still riding the "L" or buses? Still operating in Eugene, but I am reluctant to get on one. My business clients are still requesting that I go inside houses and complete interior inspections for appraisals - crazy - I think I am going to start declining those requests, but so far have not had the courage to do so.

And, besides, how long do I really want to continue to live on this earth? I am ready to look for one of those other universes.

James Turner

On Thu, Mar 26, 2020 at 8:11 AM Nena Thomas <nenathomas@gmail.com> wrote:

I can see that this may be something like the Twilight Zone, especially to those who are social animals and do not live with others. I know very few people here in Rolla in that situation.

When we moved here, we noticed an enormous difference in attitude between C-U and Rolla. There was a lot of socializing and meeting new people going  on in C-U and nothing visible here. Here, we would start by inviting someone we met and liked to dinner and, sometimes they would accept. Never would that invitation be returned. Complete strangers would smile and greet you out on the street, but nothing else. The university departments would have Christmas parties (usually at their workplace) or picnics in the park and strictly reserved for that department's faculty and staff. The bars were really sleezy and had people we would rather not socialize with. (Called "trailer trash" in private).

We met a neighbor family. Fred had started brewing beer and discovered that the man also brewed beer. Eventually, they started a brew club that met once a month. We were invited to meet some friends of our real estate agent who we liked and socialized with every so often, but not much. I met people in the library who belonged to different departments and we were friendly, but did not socialize. Finally, after 15 years, The Public House opened. It was created by one of the kids of our original brewing neighbor. All opened up again! We went, saw people we had been acquainted with before, met new people from different walks of life, and began to SOCIALIZE! Fridays at the pub! Dinners at each other's houses! Cocktail hours at one house or another! Parties! Then...this!

Here we are again, only this time not even department parties or picnics and no meeting people at work. Our friends have gone back to their anti-social lives without a blink. Every now and then I will get an email from them linking me to a meditation site or free e-books site, or reminding me to stay at home and not to panic. Some of them eagerly sheltered as soon as the corona virus began to spread.

I created my massive flower beds for company many years ago and am eagerly catching each day of spring weather to again tend to them. Went to Lowe's yesterday (yes, out into that vast desert of the world) and bought seeds, potting soil and a couple of starter plants. For those without gardens or partners or vocal, demanding pets who just want to hear a human voice, there is the telephone! You are welcome to call me (if it is too expensive, let me know and I will call you. All I need is your phone number). Call your friends in your town (maybe they will come out and meet you in a "safe" place). Call your relatives.

Wish we all could have been stuck in one house when all of this hit. We would be driving each other crazy. But crazy in a different way. Instead of wondering how to survive without our regular routines, we would be figuring out how to survive without our regular routines. HA! (and how not to kill each other).

Nena

On Thu, Mar 26, 2020 at 8:01 AM Ken Schadt <kenschadt@gmail.com> wrote:

Well in another world.  According to one cosmology theory there are not
only an infinite number of universes, but an infinite number of them
appear at every moment each one responding to a different chance
happening in each of the infinite universes existing at that moment, and
since there are an infinite number of moments in every fraction of a
second that kind of makes it like infinity to the power of infinity to
the infinite power. and maybe there is another infinity in that chain. 
Well just something to contemplate in all the free time that we now have.

In some of those universes the baseball season has begun, but not in
ours, and it's all so far away it hardly seems to matter.

I have this friend that I used to meet at a local Corner Bakery every
other week just to talk about shit.  I met him there two weeks ago,  and
this week all the Corner Bakeries are shut down. He was touting the
downtown library as a place we could meet, but now that is closed.

But Union Station is still open.  A scattering of loners, some Amish,
some cops, some railway workers.  A McDonald's and a Dunkin Donut were
open.  The sausage, cheese, and egg croissant was not up to the
standards of the Corner Bakery egg, cheddar and bacon panini,  but it
was okay.  We talked in the great hall and then we walked through
downtown a bit, a scattering of people about.  It seemed like only the
711's, McDonald's, and Dunkin Donuts were open.

But it was like three hours of conversation with another human being,
the last time I had that was thirteen days ago at the Ten Cat.

Well just reaching out for something to say

On opening day.